Well, I'm 23 today, and let me tell you...I really didn't think that today could possibly be as cool as last years surprise party at apt 28204! I mean, no sister, no KB and especially no De...and plus, I'm up in Maitland babysitting Nicole all week.  But, let me tell you...it was awesome.

I decided that I would invite my friends to dinner...The Cheesecake Factory at the Mall of Millenia, since it was in the middle, and I had never been. I brought Nicole and had picked up Alan's roomie, Josh. Randy was already waiting there when we arrived around 7. Cy came just a min later. We were seated at a long, rectangle table for 13, since I wasn't quite sure who was coming later. Liz arrived just as we were being seated, and Alan and Marissa were next. Followed by Danielle and Tyger...what a surprise! That rounded out my guest list, minus KatieBelle, who never called me back, and Jesus and Kyle, who both were working. We ate and joked, and just had an awesome time. Liz and Randy paid for me, while, Nicole's mom gave her money for herself. Josh had offered to pay for me, but I felt wierd since I barely know him and I don't want to cross any lines with him, ya know.

Got calls from Dad and Mom of course, Jesus, Lisa, and Denise. It was awesome having most of my friends in the same room, laughing and getting along. I really do think that I must have the best friends in the whole world. It's times like these when I don't feel lonely or out of place. But, as always, these always seem to pass so quickly, while the lonely ones seem to linger.

Last week of finals, and then at least I'll have a little free time before working my ass off for the rest of the summer!  So far, my life looks like this...bio class from 8-10(which means leave the house around 7!), then babysit for Travis til about 6, during then week, and then work my two days for Disney...the things I do for money! :)

Haven't called Derrick back, since he called me two days ago. I'm just done with him, I think, and I don't know what to say to him. And Jake, that's another toughey. It just feels awkward in class, so I tend not to sit next to him anymore. It's just that if he wants to date me, he'd better call me more than just the two days we see each other, ya know. But, I really don't care, I think mainly b/c I still may have feelings for Alan. What should I do, what should I do?! It seems to me that I only want what I can't have, and right now, that's Alan. But that's not true, b/c he's so cute, and great with kids and the damn dog...so who knows, maybe we will end up together. I do know he cares about me...and everybody does say he likes me...so I'll wait and see.

Lindsay's a piece of work...a crappy, shotty piece of work, that is! She never takes her dog out, and only feeds him once in the morning, and also, has never bathed him or given him flea control. There's always crap in his cage, sometimes for days at a time, and she also never does her dishes! Hill and I do feel bad for her b/c she doesn't have any friends, but it's b/c she's such a dork and a loser. No wonder nobody else wanted to live with her!

Happy Valentine's Day!

Funny how I don't really remember what in the world I've ever done on previous V-Days. I mean, I've been here for two years now, and I had Matt in 2001...I guess I've just always worked...

Went out with Jake for lunch. I drove up I-Drive and we stopped at a sushi cafe near Hard Rock Vault. Had a drink and some veggie rice. It was really good, actually, kinda like the cous cous in Morrocco. We also got to know each other a little better. I still don't know how I feel, though...he's rough and not afraid of danger...and I'm, well, not really like that at all.

Surprisingly, Christian texted me to say Happy Valentine's Day.  Then, Alan called and we talked for a little bit. I don't know why(yes, actually I do!) I was so excited to hear from him. It's been almost a week since I saw him, and I was just waiting to hear from him...since I'm usually the one calling him. Mardi Gras parade at Universal is tonight, so he's been super busy training. Sharon said that what I really need to do is have a talk with Alan so I can figure out what I want. Good idea in theory, but I just don't want anything neg to happen with Alan...I mean, he really is one of my very good friends down here. Well, who knows...Hopefully I can sort this bugger out and move on!

What a crazy couple of months! My third and final cp has come and gone...I'm really glad I decided to do it, and it taught me a lot, but I really have many what ifs. I'm still a bit confused about my best friend. It's been a few weeks, and no word...we've never gone that long before. I don't know if I could stand losing another best friend.

Surprisingly, I have talked a lot with Ali, Lisa and Hill. That's a good. For a while there, it looked like something may have been starting between Alan and I, but now I'm not so sure. I really wish boys were not so complicated! I mean, hello! I spend the nights with him a lot and he still hasn't asked me out because he doesn't know how exactly I feel! And I've only gone to see his FOLK show 5 or 6 times in the last few weeks! Whatever...I deserve better, right?!

Schools ok...not making as good grades as I should, but I also could apply myself a lot more...maybe it's my ADD! :) Went out on an actual date with Jake Wagner on Tues night, after class. He's 23 and in 2 of my comm classes. He picked me up around 7 on his motorcycle and we rode to Macaroni Grill and then saw Torque. He said he'd take it slow on the bike...yeah, when does 120 mph count as slow?! Oh, and by the by, we also popped some wheelies on the way home! When he dropped me home around 3:30am! I leaned in to give him a peck and we ended up making out for a little. I really hope I'm not jumping into this just to make someone else jealous! That would be really bad!